Business Jargon Lover T-Shirts

"Take my advice, Haskins, and keep your out-of-the-box ideas to yourself."

"Miss Davis, bring me everything we've got on turning a two-bit hole-in-the-wall operation into a multinational juggernaut."

'Good work, I doubt whether any of the shareholders will understand it.'

'I'm tired - let's outsource dinner tonight.'

'I'll have my people call your people. Wait a minute, that won't work. I'm a sole proprietor.'

"Let's sleep on it."

'It's Cornell from accounting, sir. He just wants to touch base with you.'

'Was he downsized?'

"No time for sound bites. Just give me a couple of sound nibbles."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"Sophia, will you agree to form a joint exploratory committee for marriage?"

'Your proposal is written with clarity and conviction. Send it up to legal for obfuscation.'

We don't call these savage screaming fits. We call them confrontation verbal interfacing.

"This merger is not producing the expected synergies."

'We no longer call it 'hiring' - we now call it 'insourcing'.'

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

'This is gobbledygook. I asked for mumbo-jumbo.'

"He has to put a fiver in every time he says 'fiscal imperative' or 'target orientated processes'"

"We’re leveraging knowledge of niche opportunities to maximize strategic advantages."

"Can you smell that, Jacobs? That’s the smell of me about to offer you a retirement package."

"The best laid plans of mice and men... differ materially in their objectives."

Terms and conditions on the mount

"I kicked the idea of mowing the lawn into the long grass."

GDP and G&T.

"Enhanced branding metrics drive robust solutions for scalable monetization of jargon."

'Ladies and gentlemen, we are the best team money can buy. Now LET'S PLAY BALL!'

"Al could you unpack these mining issues for us whilst Joel drills down to get some detail on the parcel problem."

'I was a tall, handsome prince, and an evil witch downsized me.'

"Call a meeting, Miss Pendleton. I want to hear some Corporate Creole."

Digital Marketing

"That wasn't daydreaming; I was internalizing my goal targeted self performance metrics."

JIT -Jittery Inventory Turnover