Burnt Offering Veteran Gifts

'Did you follow a recipe book for this dish?'

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

Another day at work would be one too many...

Barbeque Casualty.

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

"I think that might have been one deadline too many for Tim!"

"If you're not on the brink of despair you're part of the problem"

'The trouble with success is that the formula is the same for a nervous breakdown.'

"I don't think we can put off dealing with 'presenteeism' any longer."

Pre-vacation-burn-out radiology reports.

Doctor sleeps in a patients bed.

'Oh, just my old war injury acting up.'

You Know You're Old When...

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

"I'm burned out on fetching. I'm thinking of changing careers."

'No, Stanworth, feeling sick of your job does not qualify you for sick leave.'

"Sorry I'm late again, boss. I got held up in self-doubt and regrets."

"It's the worst part of working here...spending so much time with people at the end of their tether, ill, stressed, desperate for help..."

When you are most likely to be stabbed in the back

'Did you finish the business plan and out look for the next five years?'

'Is it still edible?'

And I got an honorary Purple Heart for sticking myself with one of my flag pins.

"You know, Daddy... We should thank a vet every day."

Organic Soldering.

"I think you misunderstood our new work from home policy-- you work eight hours here at the office, then you get to take your work home with you."

'You're vaarking too aard,'

'- but I didn't think it meant a two-made-into one-suit, dammit!'

'I feel so proud. Dad says my cooking is just like Mum's.'

"This is your supervision, your time. Feel free to tell me anything."

RAF Rapidly Approaching Forty

Historic Medical Moments: The first time a body rejected a heart before it was transplanted.

'Thank you.'

'I think the 'burn and serve' rolls are done.'