Bullseye Banterer Gifts

'I'm Sorry.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

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'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

"Don’t worry. You’re looking at the Frederick H. Tuttle Middle School long-jump champion."

"I consider myself a passionate man, but, of course, a lawyer first."

'Oh for God's sake just ignore it!'

A breakthrough moment for the Wright brothers. How about some wings with that?

"This may be the beer, Zoloft, Rogaine, Cialis and Avapro talking ... but I feel weird."

"Sipsies?"

"... And this, gentlemen, is our target for the next six months."

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

"I've spent the last 6 months teaching myself escapology."

CartoonStock Upload"You are an all-round good guy!"

'Thank you for calling the bullpen,,, To continue in English, Press one,,,'

"Who's a pretty boy?"

"Face it, William - you're shit at it!"

Dart player with long darts. 'Look, rules are meant to be broken, aren't they?'

Musical arrows.

'Hey carrot-breath! You still mad cause we ran you a little today? Hounds gotta make a living too, ya know.'

'Stop me when I start extolling the virtues of socialism.'

"Your resume is impressive."

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Thank you for not engaging in pointless debates.

Dad learns about the difficulties of Statistical Sampling.

'What you look at it? You want a piece of me, is that what you want?'

'If they didn't want us around, how come they keep putting food out for us?"

"The reason I couldn't make it as a lawyer is I couldn't pass a bar."

'I still have all my own teeth but my head is false.'

'I hate harmonica music.'

"It's the big guy."

"Yeah, our first album went vinyl."

"Yep, it's irritable fowl syndrome alright."

"You're doing it wrong."

"You're welcome to visit my internet site, but not my apartment."