Bullseye Banterer Gifts

'I'm Sorry.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

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'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

"I consider myself a passionate man, but, of course, a lawyer first."

"Don’t worry. You’re looking at the Frederick H. Tuttle Middle School long-jump champion."

'Oh for God's sake just ignore it!'

"... And this, gentlemen, is our target for the next six months."

"Sipsies?"

"This may be the beer, Zoloft, Rogaine, Cialis and Avapro talking ... but I feel weird."

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

"Who's a pretty boy?"

"Face it, William - you're shit at it!"

'Thank you for calling the bullpen,,, To continue in English, Press one,,,'

CartoonStock Upload"You are an all-round good guy!"

Dart player with long darts. 'Look, rules are meant to be broken, aren't they?'

"I've spent the last 6 months teaching myself escapology."

Musical arrows.

'Hey carrot-breath! You still mad cause we ran you a little today? Hounds gotta make a living too, ya know.'

Thank you for not engaging in pointless debates.

'Stop me when I start extolling the virtues of socialism.'

"Your resume is impressive."

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Dad learns about the difficulties of Statistical Sampling.

'What you look at it? You want a piece of me, is that what you want?'

'If they didn't want us around, how come they keep putting food out for us?"

"The reason I couldn't make it as a lawyer is I couldn't pass a bar."

'I hate harmonica music.'

'I still have all my own teeth but my head is false.'

"It's the big guy."

"Yeah, our first album went vinyl."

"You're doing it wrong."

"Go on, impress me." "I can talk to animals."

"You're welcome to visit my internet site, but not my apartment."