Bugged Out Viewer T-Shirts

'I don't know how you kids can sit around all day watching this garbage on television.'

'I found the termites!'

What's that? - 'It's a mosquito bite.' - 'Scratch it!' - 'No, I need to buy some cream.' - 'Make it bleed!!!' - 'Gahhh!!!' -

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"It was your idea to install the TV dish on the church spire"

Black hole setting

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

Cockroaches struggle to use the ski lift.

Today I am trying to grow a bit of beard...

Zika Epidemic

"To be perfectly frank, the preceding was a paid political bunch of lies."

"Oh, look. Here comes the winner of the miniature Marmaduke look-alike contest!"

2016 Policlicks

Man blowing glass. His dentures have fallen out and are in the glass bubble.

"Do you want to watch the, 'everything's terrible' cable news or the, 'everything's wonderful' cable news?"

The Virus de Milo

"Don't worry, everybody will be expecting an elephant in the room."

'And what about you cowardly lion, have you seen my little Toto...?'

"Billy's cheating, Susan is lying, Dave, no, that's Gary, no, Bob. Bob's stealing?"

'Yes - He's armed.'

'Warning: portions of the following program may destroy what little faith you have left in human nature.'

'Oh,yeah? Well, I bet I've had a worse day than you!!'

"It's from that Alastair Cooke again"

"I understand your concern, but you don't have to wear that suit when getting on a public website. That's not how germs are spread."

"We can do this the hard way, or we can do this the easy peasy lemon squeezy way."

A family hides from the TV news.

Wasp

Strainspotting

I've only been a doctor for 15 minutes, but, ok, Mrs. Rhinewald, I'm gonna give it to you straight. You've only got 24 hours to live - but then, we're mayflies - we all have only 24 hours to live...

"Oi - are you looking at my turd..?"