Budget Cooking Gifts

"We make all our cupcakes with love, which is way cheaper than real vanilla."

Curry for Breakfast.

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

'Waiter, you seem to have mixed my bill up with somebody who wants to buy this restaurant.'

AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

'Don't overdo the mustard, sir -- we're trying to control costs around here.'

"It's a new way to stretch leftovers. Saw it in Homeopathy Now."

"Tell your chef I'd like something for a refined and cultured palate. For under ten bucks."

Deep in the heart of the one-star restaurant district...'Guess what you're eating buffet!'

'We're having leftovers again. Don't worry, I shaved off all the fuzzy parts. I'm going to knit you a sweater.'

'I'm afraid we've reached the point where we have to cut out luxuries. How do you feel about food?'

"I'm sorry, due to budget cuts we had to reduce kitchen staff."

"Well if bread's free, and gravy's free, how about bread and gravy?"

Posh restaurant - 'We'll have the sandwiches.'

Camper special! PORK 'N' BEANS...50 gallons...only $49.99...Limit: 3 per customer.

"We use the cheapest ingredients and pass the savings on to you."

'The lower-priced items contain genetically-modified foods not yet approved for human use.'

Pizza By The Slice

Al's Diner. All You Can Eat $4.95. Well, shall we scurry up and down the food chain?

'You've got to help me, Doc -- My Diner's Club card is maxed out!'

Thrift: Sew your mouth shut before going to a restaurant.

"I work twelve hours a day to make ends meat...but then I'm way too knackered to cook it!"

"It's exactly how Jamie Oliver would make it if he couldn't afford half the ingredients either!"

'What's affordable tonight?'

'Letting you pick up the check will help you stay on your diet.'

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

'Sorry about dinner, honey...ever since your dad was laid off work we've been trying to figure out new ways to make dinner.'

Please give! Buying organic food doesn't come cheap.

"It's become so expensive, that if I want sushi, I have to catch my own!"

"I've discovered a great way to diet...I just look at the price of food and I lose my appetite!"

'What an uncanny coincidence! The starter, main course, dessert and wine you've ordered are all the cheapest on the menu!'