Budget Cooking Gifts

"We make all our cupcakes with love, which is way cheaper than real vanilla."

Curry for Breakfast.

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

'Waiter, you seem to have mixed my bill up with somebody who wants to buy this restaurant.'

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

'Don't overdo the mustard, sir -- we're trying to control costs around here.'

"It's a new way to stretch leftovers. Saw it in Homeopathy Now."

Deep in the heart of the one-star restaurant district...'Guess what you're eating buffet!'

'We're having leftovers again. Don't worry, I shaved off all the fuzzy parts. I'm going to knit you a sweater.'

Posh restaurant - 'We'll have the sandwiches.'

Camper special! PORK 'N' BEANS...50 gallons...only $49.99...Limit: 3 per customer.

'I'm afraid we've reached the point where we have to cut out luxuries. How do you feel about food?'

"Well if bread's free, and gravy's free, how about bread and gravy?"

"We use the cheapest ingredients and pass the savings on to you."

"I'm sorry, due to budget cuts we had to reduce kitchen staff."

'The lower-priced items contain genetically-modified foods not yet approved for human use.'

Pizza By The Slice

Thrift: Sew your mouth shut before going to a restaurant.

"I work twelve hours a day to make ends meat...but then I'm way too knackered to cook it!"

'You've got to help me, Doc -- My Diner's Club card is maxed out!'

"It's become so expensive, that if I want sushi, I have to catch my own!"

'What's affordable tonight?'

'Letting you pick up the check will help you stay on your diet.'

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

'Sorry about dinner, honey...ever since your dad was laid off work we've been trying to figure out new ways to make dinner.'

Please give! Buying organic food doesn't come cheap.

"I've discovered a great way to diet...I just look at the price of food and I lose my appetite!"

'What an uncanny coincidence! The starter, main course, dessert and wine you've ordered are all the cheapest on the menu!'

"Could I have your leftovers menu?"