Budget Awareness Advocate Pillows

"Students...we had some changes over summer. The good news is our classroom size has been cut by 15 percent! The bad news...our desk budget has been cut by 40 percent!"

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

Fuel bill gone through the roof

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

'Well I've finished the project on time and on budget!' 'Oh, that means I've given you too much time and too much money!'

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

'I said we've got to lift up our numbers! I did not say to turn a loss of 150.000,- into a loss of 280.000,-!!'

'I want you stop referring to our grant as 'The Big Dipper.''

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

'He joined the party in support of the police cuts.'

'The operation we want you to do is to remove 25 from our budgets.'

Percentage Lifetime Income.

"Yes dear. But, I don't think you're actually supposed to dispose of your disposable income."

Test: Guess who will suffer the most to reduce the deficit?

Now hiring: crowdfunding expert to reduce the US budget deficit.

"Mr. Chairman, distinguished guests, Gramm, Rudman, Hollings..."

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

'He has no romance. For special occasions, he gives me a coupon for a card and chocolates that will be 50% off the next day.'

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

'Can I help? You bet your bottom dollar I can.'

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

'Actually, the bill is part of your reality therapy.'

Sam's Nation Building

"Once upon a time there was a thing called social security..."

"We're going to spend £5M to put over the message that our product is so good it sells itself!"

'Budget cuts have forced NASA to find alternative training methods.'

"I agree, it fits perfectly...but not my budget!"