Breakfast Experimenters Mugs

'Mom, I don't care how high in fiber they are. Broccoli flakes are going to fail as a breakfast cereal.'

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

It was then that Cervantes was inspired.

"You were supposed to have invented fire!"

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

Win-win. Whenever I hear that from you, I want to hide under the counter. New research shows the only proven way to prolong life is caloric restriction. Eat less, live longer. Introducing our new breakfast meal plan: The Fountain of Youth. You get half a muffin and half a glass of water. Sounds meager. Exactly. That's why we're charging $16. But a full muffin only costs $4. And it won't prolong your life. Can you even put a price on immortality? How much should we charge for an empty plate of ai

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

"I get a fresh food kit delivered for lunch. All I need to do is chop, cook, and enjoy!"

Seriously, try leaving them out for a day. They're delicious al dente!

F&E Diner. You asked for a hot breakfast, so I put some jalapenos on your corn flakes!

'We're starting a new diet today -- do you want your tofu scrambled or fried?'

Cooking Contest. I hear you can make tempura out of anything. Yep -- Anything you can do, I can do battered!

April 12,1989: The last day Ryan ever ate pancakes. 'I ran out of pancake mix so I fried up patties of my facial cream.'

New From The People Who Brought You I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-A-Petroleum-By-Product Sandwich Spread

"First, break the egg...."

Soup on a stick

World Cup breakfast.

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'

'How did you get your pastry so thin?' Steam roller.

It's the little surprises that keep a marriage exciting...

'If only you would let me cover this Tofu-vegetables stuff with ketchup, it would at least LOOK like real food...'

Egg Armour Plating

'Did you know that cereal is the only thing with a prize in it?!'

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'

Curry for Breakfast.

"Lab-grown?"

Man in pyjamas walks into cereal cafe

Signs your breakfast is trying to kill you.