Brandy Lover Gifts

'Good afternoon! I'll be your rescue dog today, offering a fine selection of brandies while Bernard will be along shortly with the cheese and biscuits.'

'Ah yes, that's Henderson. Unfortunately, he found himself in my line of fire.'

Parson wishing to seem as though he is not drinking

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

A Good Batch.

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M

'No standing while room is in motion.'

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

Candle Portraits.

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

'You know what they say...live fast, die young and leave a great fossil.'

"Dessert?""No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

'Of course it's safe. It has no preservatives, no additives, no artificial coloring...'

'Joe has been partying hard!'

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

CASA DE JOY PREMIUM TEQUILA STONE BISSETT DISTILLERY CONT. NET.1000 ML 40% ALC Vol.

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

'You've got to help me, Doc! I've got a crush on St. Valentine all Year!!'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

'Guess how many I ATE.'

'I told that boy no snacks before dinner, , ,'

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

'You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake!'

"Don't take the ones with teeth marks. They've got hard centres ."

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'