Brainy Gift Pillows

Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Is it that bad?"

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

'They took my Science Fair Award away. They said I ate too much fish, which is brainfood. So, it was like I was on mental steroids.'

Spindle Neurons

"My therapist plays with my brain."

Dog training

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

Child lifting alphabet blocks.

Nervous Student

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

(I'm afraid someone is going to expose me as a phony, a fraud, … A complete charlatan.) (Uh, oh! He's on to me!)

Turning off the thinking lightbulb at home time.

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

Doctor with pump: 'Hold on a second while I inflate his ego.'

"So you're saying if I wasn't so smart, I'd have more friends?"

I'm sorry, but your drug screen results disqualify you as an employment candidate, You see, sample 'A' is a normal brain, sample 'B' is a normal brain on drugs, and sample 'C',,, Well, Mr, Dumpty, sample 'C' is your brain,

Brain Exercise Video: "Okay, think...and stop...and think, and stop! Stay with me now! Think harder! Feel that burn!"

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'But when you decided to go into psychology didn't you REALIZE that you'd be ‘surrounded by idiots'?'

Psychology: Module 1 . . . . Attention span.

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

'You're in denial.'

"There's gotta be something profound in here...."

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

"Why do you have to be so smart? You'd be more popular if you acted normal."

"So, what makes you think I'm a therapist?"

'Now, just for laughs, let's give him the dog brain and see what happens.'

'Honestly, dear, brains again?'

Annual Amnesia Convention

They're brothers. One is very intelligent. The other is a baseball pitcher who constantly cheats. They both have a lot on the ball!

In the physiology depat. Professor Rickman was known as being one lobe short of a limbic system.

Einstein.