Bookworm's Chuckle Pillows

Origin of Species - "This is hard to swallow."

The practical psychopath

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

'Look mum and dad! They let me keep my appendix!' - A young book excitedly showing off his appendix to his arriving parents.

Trivia/Great Literature.

CHANNEL THIRTEEN TAKES ON THE NETWORKS

Bird reading '1001 pickup lines' - 'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

'Classic literature for D.I.Y. haters'

Man's Logic/Woman's Logic

'If you must laugh, will you do it in the humour section please?'

EAT HAY LOVE One Horse's Search for Everything

"Randy, if you were stranded on an island, what's the one book you'd want to have along with you?" "Easy: Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy. It's got the perfect heft to knock coconuts out of trees." "Well, I'd like to have How to Get Off an Island, by Archie Macguyver." "That title's actually a metaphor for overcoming shyness." "We really should have our own book review show."

"It's a book about how to ask for a raise, '50 shades of Pay'."

Success Without Effort

'I see you've dressed to go clubbing.'

'Actually, sir, almost everything is on the restricted shelf.'

"This book is the future of literature. It is paper-free to help save the planet and completely free of words and images so no one is offended."

The Joy of Sioux

How to show some hustle.

"We've gotta move on, I can't digest this stuff!"

'I'd like to exchange these cola can tokens for a book on hyperactivity.'

Clearance.

'The 12 Habits of People Just Barely Holding Their Own.'

Book about the real meaning of Christmas is on sale.

'Let's say we spent the summer devouring literature. We ate alphabet soup, didn't we?'

'Sure it's an impressive collection. Too bad they're all overdue library books.'

Real Life Bookshop.

Woman throws a book titled 'How To Get Along With Others' at a passer-by.

Passion reached a new height in the bedroom that night - Holly couldn't put her Mills and Boon novel down.

A Book Review of the Phone Book: A hefty paperback with too many characters and not enough plot development. Next week, we'll review a more complex work--your phone bill.

'Please answer the question and stop saying you can read about it in your book.'

'If I want to listen to music in otherwise total silence I'll have a night in with Geoff.'