Bond Market Buff Pillows

"This is Ludwig. He's our expert in the inverted yield curve."

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

"That's the shoestring I started with. It was tied around 100 million dollars worth of stocks and bonds."

The day the stock market went UP.

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"I don't like the look of this."

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'...and this time Gerald, don't refer to the RBS as the Ripoff Bonus Scheme!'

"Nice work on that German contract. You've made your mark, Ashworth."

The symbol for the euro (?) depicted as the wheel of a wheelchair, symbolising the state of the currency

"Don't worry! He's totally changed..."

What happened when the bond issues failed during the building of the Great Wall of China: The Great Picket Fence of China.

"We do have faith but I'm afraid our policy is still not to accept Bitcoin."

Spanish bank needs propping up.

"I wouldn't stand there, if I were you."

'I love it when you talk big bucks, Mr. Williams.'

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

'Don't mind him. He gets this wa every time they start talking about the inverse relationship between bond yields and prices.'

'Bob was eventually arrested and charged with outsider trading.'

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

Euro against the Dollar.

"Squawk! Interest rates are going negative!"

'How about a windfall tax on baked beans?'

'Money, I'm home!'

(Stocks) (Bonds) (Off Wall St.)

Big Loan, Little Deposit Bank

"I told you everyone would come as a bull or a bear..."

World-Wide Bank: Economic crisis lands in the in-tray.

Offshore tax havens.

'I just checked my portfolio and it's worth a small fortune. Unfortunately, I started with a large fortune.'

America's funniest investment scams

'He said his first words today - 'dividend reinvest'.'