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Clancy: Never Making the Same Mistake Twice

The first car accident.

Nobody's Perfact (spelled wrong)

'Oh, now that's a nice vase...'

'I just faxed my tie to our Des Moines office.'

"I think it is most admirable," said Alice, "that you gave up a thriving law practice to be with this lovely child."

' NO...NO..Mabel...BUNS!...Hot cross BUNS!'

Why do we have pistols? I thought we were back-to-back to see who is taller!

"Riddle your salad with pepper, sir?"

"Of course failure is an option; I use it all the time!"

"What? The invitation said, wear your favorite mask."

'Now we'll try some word association.', 'Fling dorp snoogle!'

'No, I thought you were John Simpson.'

'Where's Beiber?'

'You haven't much experience in plant conservation, have you Winthorpe?'

"It's Albert's revamped version of the old 'arrow through the head' gag, but it still needs a bit of work."

"Elves, Jerry, I asked for elves."

Big deal - give her the one from that screwball who came in last week.

"That's chemical law for you. No matter how minor the damage claim, our fee is always major."

"I'm trying to decide between a cocktail with a cute name and one that's blatantly sexual."

"We're not that kind of SWAT team, ma'am."

'Replace divots'

'Think' Sign (nail facing wrong way)

'Oh it's not what it looks like... We're lawyers!'

'Not only the first wheel, the first road accident as well!'

'I wonder why we geeks don't get more women?'

'Season of Farce'

"Tell me - where do you get all your ideas?"

Man sweeps through newly painted 'entrance' door, knocking over sign painter on the other side.

"Go away. I haven't had an accident that wasn't my fault in the last three years."

Hunting man hits his host

'He preferred his murphy with a wheen of triose.'

"Hi everyone, and welcome to this TED talk on how not to run a business. . ."

Kanye and Kim at Home...

At the age of only 15 months, Jason was already a master of reverse psychology.