Blinking Expert Mugs

'Curses! My eyes were closed.'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"Hi, I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn."

'He followed me home! Can he hibernate here?'

NeighWoof.

"I'll have my article pulled together in no time."

Keys to Success: Focus, Alertness, Concentration...

"I said, the brewery has rather overdone the ambiance in here..."

Riding the statue.

"You can find me on Inkedin."

Come dine with me!

"You tend to overuse the exclamation point."

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

"He's in a high stake poker game right now."

The Peacock Is Not Renowned For His Bluffing Abilities

Bird watching in Bolivia

"If anyone can balance a career with motherhood and state-sponsored terrorism, it's Jeannie."

'I'm all in.'

"I'm afraid Mr. Edison is too busy to discuss your idea what you at this time. Please call again, Mr Fluorescent."

"For the next Christmas party pot luck, let's skip the finger foods."

The seeing-eye cat.

'Previously on 'Mummies and Daddies...''

'I wonder if they KNOW about each other?'

A Very Good Idea

'It may be a waiter's friend, but it certainly isn't yours.'

"Hey, kid — tell your invisible friend to turn off the invisible fence."

'To you, it's a refrigerator. To me, it's a blank canvas!'

"Behold, as I guide our conversation to my narrow area of expertise."

"Is it your intention to seethe for the next four years?"

Patents office, "That looks like a brilliant idea Mr Edison"

'I see our kids are networking.'