Black And White Admirer Pillows

'Black and white'

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

bird interprets modern art

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

Jackson Pollock Signs A Rent Check

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

Prisoner still life painting.

"You know I hate birthdays!"

'Picasso'

"She's a golden retriever...I've always had a thing for blondes!"

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

"Here the artist opted for a more impressionistic approach, because drawing a tree is hard."

"I like it, Julian — it speaks to what a waste of time and money your MFA was."

"It's a great work!"

Landscape Artists

"To me..It says Art Council crap regional funding"

'Why, yes madam, these are my paintings. How did you know?'

'Sorry, but I think your Mondrian tattoo was a mistake.'

'The artist did this one during his 'I've got no idea' - period.'

'The crepes of wrath.' 'Joad's mobile pancake store.'

"I don't pretend to be great. I merely know myself to be very, very good."

Rembrandt's Selfies

'What are they worth? Well, it's difficult to put a price on such extraordinary works of art. How much you got?'

The Big Picture

They had the technology to rebuild him: The $ 6,000,000 egg.

People with tilted heads looking at crooked art gallery painting

'Doing this was easy. Finding someone nuts enough to buy the crap - THAT'S art!'

'It's from his, ‘Hey, my kid could do better than that' period.'

"Can you guess how much it will be worth after you die?"