Birthday In Middle Age T-Shirts

Breast Height Chart

"Relax. At your age, it's common to have a nose hare now and then."

Multi-Generational Books

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

'I refuse to relinquish the title, 'Top Young Exec'.'

"This old bike of mine has sure lost some if its speed over the years."

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

The best way to prevent sagging is to keep eating until the wrinkles fall out.

"The cape comes off too."

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

Middle Age: When rolling out of bed is easy, but getting up off the floor isn't!

The Aging of Underwear

"Put it under your pillow, and maybe you'll get a visit from the hair fairy."

You know you're getting older: when your back goes out more often than you do!

Male Pattern Baldness

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

"You've come to a fork in the road – age-defying or age-appropriate?"

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

"Don't kid yourself. Harold, you're no spring chicken!"

Undiagnosed middle-age-onset discomfort summer tour

'I've added a few minutes to that hour glass figure I had in school.'

Randolph maintains a stiff upper lip while the rest of him just goes to hell.

"My name is Jane and I've been forty-six for 30 days."

Middle Age: When the four letter word you use most is 'What?'

Hot flashes

"You're looking for 'Sex After Fifty'? That's in the 'fiction' department."

Getting old...

"It's a deal: Two more years, then we let ourselves go."

"Let's face it, Michele. We're not getting any older."

"Let's face it,Rhoda-you're no spring chicken yourself!"

"Do you want anything? I'm going into the kitchen to forget what I went in there for."

'It's my biological clock.'

How to injury yourself as an adult