Biology Joke Lovers Prints

"Never bring a pet to school . . . especially if it's a frog!"

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

Extinction of the dinosaurs fully explained

"Just for fun today we could fire some eggs around."

'But Timmy, you have to eat your antibiotics, or you'll never become a big and strong bacteria.'

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

'The suspense is killing us. Which one is our grandchild?'

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

"...I think we've found the missing link!"

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

It's an experiment.

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

'What makes you think we have a radiation leak?'

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

How Patrick Moore chooses a hotel..."Hmmm four stars".

"Actually, I find his murky past rather attractive."

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

'I started off as a single cell and now I'm in one.'

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

'I've got an amoeba here who wants to go to Officer's Candidate School.'

The One That Newton Missed

I hate it when the moon shows his dark side...

Molecules you ought to be aware of...

Pencils, Markers, Pens, Genetic Markers.

Great progress has been made in the science of genetic clowning.

'Thanks for helping me out with this prank - I just love freaking out people!'