Biological Storyteller T-Shirts

Mendel and the Pea.

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

The Environmentalist

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

The Adventures of God

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"This is so fun - I've been wagging my tail so much my cheeks hurt!"

The Origins of Everything

Silhouette hawk swooping down to catch a silhouette rabbit.

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

Dragon Recycling the Knights it has defeated

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

'Poor Oog -- evolution sure has AGED him!'

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

"There's a cure—but it's light-years away."

Trying to describe the size of the Big Bang.

Lion to safari man: 'I'm the king of the jungle and these are my official spokesmen.'

Two 'superheros' show the discrepancy in toilet paper production.

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'I don't know whether we should call the world pres or keep quiet?'

'NASA is never going to believe this!'

"You're overprotective. Stop telling her not to go out on a limb."

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

Polar Bear Paparazzi.

"Well, I deal with death and carrion every day: Laughing is a therapeutic way of avoiding depression..."

"Stop playing dumb, young man. I wasn't pulled out of a hat yesterday."

Isaac Newton and the Apple Tree

If you left the window open and the light on when I was little, the room would fill with insects...

"I feel like we're finally making progress."

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."