Bible Stories Mugs

Loaves and Fishes - Buy 2 get 5000.

'S**t!'

"Bad news - the unicorns are gay."

"Well, now the flood warning's been downgraded to just a light mid-afternoon sprinkle."

"I can't help thinking there's a book in this."

On the Seventh Day

"Behold! A most unusual star in the East." "Could be trouble." "Let's not get involved." Three very wise men.

'At this time, I'd like to point out some of the safety features and emergency exits that our craft is equipped with...'

'Bad news everyone! The Ark didn't turn out as I expected.'

'You've got the wrong man, I tell you! -- I'm John the METHODIST!'

If it had been today...

'Ask Jesus to stop multiplying bread and fishes...it's the plates what we need now.'

'Oh, ick! -- I just stepped on a fish!'

'While we're at it - let's cruise the Bahamas!'

Haman as a child

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

'He promises us manna and give us commandments - Classic bait-and-switch!'

1600 BC: The flood waters eventually subside.

Stress Management.

'A free forty day cruise? There's gotta be a catch.'

David loses focus for just a moment: 'Wow a petoskey stone.'

'When this is over with, I'm going to need a LOT of aromatherapy!'

There are extenuating circustances when you consider that the apple was covered in dark chocolate and rolled in macadamia nuts....I'm only human.'

'So who gets the apple tree and who gets the fig leaves?' 'The First Prenuptial Agreement.'

Shepherd points out the north star to 3 wisemen holding maps.

Regendering Christmas

"If Noah asks... Just tell him you've all had your vaccinations."

'Yes, all at once!'

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

'What?'

'What's Adam doing behind that bush?'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Pool Rules: No Diving, No Splashing, No Walking on Water.

'Thousands of fish begging to be caught, and we only brought two worms.'

Three very wise men.