Beverage Testing Pillows

'We let 65 people try the '03 Malbec and told them they couldn't just describe it as 'good'. The result: 65 said it was 'very good'.'

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

Low-Energy Drinks

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

Wine taster with mineral water

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

Wine of the Day Club

What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

'Sorry, I only drink still wines. I don't have the patience to wait for bubbles to pop.'

"Baldo, the summer is almost gone and you still haven't found a job!"

"Would you prefer sparkling water, filtered water, tap water or water?"

Scientific Tea.

"I don't know if I've mentioned this before, Greg, but you are a very attractive man."

'So that's why they use the Dutch flag colours...it's flat!' (Pepsi logo on vending machine)

'While 10-15 years of cellaring are recommended and would certainly improve the bouquet and taste, no, there'sno reason why you can't go out back, behind the dumpster and down the whole thing in 1 chug.'

Grinds

'I thought he would run all sorts of scientific tests.'

'I hate making decisions - just bring me a bottle of each.'

Scot's beer.

Good, huh? I grind my own cocoa beans.

"Still sparkling"

the Lesser-known Nogs

Potato-ade - unleash the awesome power of the potato!

'I'm seizing the day.'

Man sees energy drink go hopping by.

Global Warming.