Beverage Rebel T-Shirts

"There were gasps of horror as Nigel appeared holding a mug of coffee."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

Little girl dangling from her horse track.

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

Thou Shalt Not!

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

Lockdown casserole

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

"Fresh pepper spray?"

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"I'm unable to process this image."

Pirates at the mall.

'I never knew baking was such a violent activity. You have to beat the eggs, whip the cream, and mash the nuts.'

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

Hip-hop cops on stage.

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

'I had the recipe upside down, so it's beefed corn.'

Woman reads Nigella Lawson cook book: 'Add butter to the mixture, remembering to moisten your lips ... whisk for three to four minutes, pouting throughout ...'

'Louise, everyone is wearing that this year ... don't be such a sheep to fashion.'

Recipes.

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

"I used to be old, too, but it wasn't my cup of tea."

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

"Which one of my fiendish offspring defaced the bordelaise recipe with SpongeBob?"