Bedtime Ritual Enthusiasts Mugs

"Dumbledore smiled, his eyes twinkling."

"Goodnight, dear. Goodnight, Scooter. Goodnight, erection."

"I wish we lived in one of those later time zones."

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

Bedtime Stories with Gordon Ramsay

'It wouldn't hurt to say a few words.'

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

Bedtime story.

Father nursing his sick child

A.S.A.P.'s Fables

'I can't sleep. I'm too awake.'

fairy tales

The Tooth Ferret

"This bedtime story is brought to you by your good friends at the toy shop."

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

"This is all I have time for now, dear...the knight slays the dragon and marries the princess. For more detail go to www.fairytale.net."

"I'll leave the door open and the hallway light on, but you're much too old to need an attorney in your room."

'... I couldn't remember if I had switched off the light!'

"I love wearing a sleeper. It's like I can walk around tucked in."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

"No, I want a story I already know all the words to."

"Oh, great. The bunny runs away and lives high on the hog on my tax dollars. Next!"

Sleeping masks

Please take them off

'That's all for tonight, God. Stay tuned.'

Father reading a bedtime story to his daughter.

"The Three Wise Men followed a star...wasn't their GPS working?"

'All right. I'll get forty winks, but not one wink more.'

"His nose grew every time he lied? That must've taken all the fun out of fishing."

'And so we come to the concluding episode of Barthelmew Cubbins and the 500 hats.'