Becoming A School Principal Pillows

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'

A Puppet Named Juan

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"I guess it took a pandemic to make me realize school is better than trying to learn stuff online."

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'This test doesn't understand me.'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

"We hardly ever intercept hard copy notes anymore, Stanley."

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

'Kiddie school is teaching about sharing; and someone shared their cold with Jennie,'

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"I take it you got the lead in the school play."

'Let's put it this way Tommy, if we could go below F minus you would be forging new territory!'

"I hope you're not going to let this I.P.O. affect your grades."

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

'Al, this is Jack. He's with the Committee to Eliminate the Board of Education. Jack, this is Al. He's with the Committee to Increase Funding for the Board of Education.'

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'