Beauty Norm Challenger Mugs

"Love that new pox!"

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

The Mainstream

Do not think outside the box!

Missing my hair.

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

Man Inside TV Produces Ideal Viewer

A man without a chicken on his head!

"She's genetically modified, you know."

"It's very sensitive of you to realize that men like to get flowers!"

Veni, Vidi, Vici, Mani, Pedi.

"You ain't wearin' a brassiere." "How could you tell?" "Cuz the wrinkles are all stretched out of yer face."

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

"Touch that and you're a dead man."

It says, "In lieu of gifts, please consider a donation to the automaker of your choice." Invite!

Bar Refaeli

'It's the half-empty bag of cookies from the back of the pantry. Should I tell them you'll call back?'

Romee Strijd caricature

"Grandma, this is now how some schools say obey the rules."

A Woman Asking The Father's Permission To Marry His Son.

Katy Perry

We're never going to lose weight if we don't get rid of the fridge light.

"My talent agent tells me I have the perfect face for a hand model."

"Girlfriend, you're not fat. You're just retaining a little water."

'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'

"Of course I love your long hair Rapunzel. But maybe you could shave your legs just once in a while?"

"Naturally curly hair."

'I got him for self defense. Boze eats my wife's leftovers.'

As soon as the diet ends the lost weight returns.

"Shall I be mother?"

"Mom, Dad, am I adopted?"

"What? It's been ten years. . . She's had six kids for goodness sake. She can't still be the fairest of them all!"

'No, man, I don't know where you're coming from. But if I had to guess, I'd say the early Seventies.'

The Dance Circa 1970