Beauty Makeover Buff Gifts

"Yes, I think I'll have the vag/boob make-over combo plate."

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

Meanwhile in Hollywood

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

'Have you no common scents?!'

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

Sheep In Curlers

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

Do you think I'm sixty?

The Cat Spa

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

Frank & Ernest. Signe Painted. Cosmetology Dept. That should be "cosmology"! Why do you always get those two confused? I always think the one about space should have an "et" in it.

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

Two men in barber shop

"Here they come: Detox and Botox."

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

Complete Makeover

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

'Will the surgery leave a scar?'

MD - Cosmetic Surgery and Investment Portfolio Makeovers.

'Of course I'll love you when you 'go grey'... Why shouldn't I... I've loved you through six other shades!'

Parrot looking in mirror has feather headdress options.

Level up your game with a MANicure.

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

"It turs out my milk is actually aging cream...so, I use it to remove all those ugly age spots."

"Did you get some work done?"

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'