Beauty In The Ordinary Pillows

'There're hideous aren't they?'

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

The adoration of the gels.

Bad fake tan day.

Spa

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

Bad hair day!

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

Dragon Hair-dryer.

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

Shampoo.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

"Round and round the cauldron we go, in the exfoliating toner I throw."

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Lesser known greek gods,

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Dating is so expensive...

Pampered and poodled.

Cover Design for the Yellow Book, Vol 3- Street Lamps Lighting a Lady's Toilet Mirror

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Too much concealer?"

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'Have you no common scents?!'

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

Could you see anything in her? I certainly couldn't! (Man's eyes are popping out of his head).