Baseball Banter Pillows

'Try not to dip your shoulder and keep your head in there. Remember, all the great ones go through slumps.'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'Oh, and this ringtone is an app that alerts me when a fly ball is headed my way.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

"...They must be poor catchers, there's two men behind the plate."

'No way, man! Murphy isn't worth anywhere near the 3.5 million they're paying him!'

Expansion 2000: The Baton Rouge Ball Boys

'He looks great in the field, but can he bat?'

Shows Bundt

'Go get the hose, George! That gopher is back!'

'So much for the question of whether of whether or not a curveball really curves.'

'He hits better against right handed pitching, so pitch left-handed, to him.'

'Get over it, Brady. Pitchers at this level are expected to get batters out. Randy there gave up eight runs in one inning...'

'Please cover for me Carol. I'll be away from my desk, roaming the cubicles, searching for sports talk.'

"OK maybe we should try a different sport."

'...The athletic trainer's coming with the WD-40.'

'The fish and chips are very nice.'

"Well, if you don't want to talk politics would you like to talk baseball?"

Before baseball, raccooning enjoyed a brief stint as the national pastime.

"Daddy doesn't hate the Yankees. Daddy has issues with the Yankees."

'Nice throw...'

"Things are going well, so I may as well ask: how about those Mets? Ha-ha, just kidding. The tail. Please fix this tail thing."

Baseball player: 'I'll let my bat do my talking!' BAT: '...I have nothing to say'

"Now they'll never know who's on first."

'Gimme the remote. I think you got it on slo-mo.'

Baseball umpire sweeps dirt under home plate.

"Thats for missing the bunt sign!" "Yeah, and that's for striking out on ball four, you loser!"

"My ultimate sports fantasy is to see a star player request a baseball autographed by the umpire crew."