Barnyard Observer Pillows

"No you can't borrow my eclipse glasses. I told you not to eat yours."

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

A Cow Striptease

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

Drawing on the left side of the barn.

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

"Okay, now we're too domesticated."

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

'Take a picture...it'll last longer.'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

'I've got to wake up extra early tomorrow morning. Any clue how to set this thing?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

Scrooge McCow

Doctor to pig: 'You've been pigging out on pan pizzas, eh? I'm taking you off square meals.'

"Dayum. She bootylicious."

'I wonder if I can declare you as dependents on my income taxes?'

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

"I stink... therefore, I am."

'Take it easy, you're a cow. They love cow humor.'

Three ducks: two have normal bills, third one has bill turned around like bill of cap.

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

'No. I insist. You first.'

Rooster writes out 'Things to cock-a-doodle-do.'