Bad Loan Collector T-Shirts

'Your investments in sub prime mortgages have become collectors items now! Aren't you excited?'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

"Nuts to you, too."

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'A is for Arse.'

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

"I have an app for that."

'In the future, if we're a little late with your allowance, don't just automatically turn it over to a collection agency.'

'You shouldn't have.'

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

Home Sweet Second Home.

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

"No, I don't think I have a book in me. I think I have a chicken in me."

Company profit making scheme - Jenkins, you owe us £327.95.

"About your tax refund—would you like to donate it to help pay off the national debt?"

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

"The interest rate can't go any lower, so if necessary, we'll have to go back to pounds of flesh."

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

The Boss.

'If you don't pay us, I'll tell all your creditors you have.'

You trip on it, you buy it.

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

"Let's text her, she'd like that."

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

Pile of books for sale with sign: Expired Fifteen-Minutes-of-Fame Books.

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'