Backyard Buff Pillows

'Do you want the leaf blower?'

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

Aprons

"Come on, we've thought of 492 names surely we can get one more"

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Hey Neil, you wanna come hang out with us today?"

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

"Over millions of years, carbon turns to diamond. Yet it took dad plus his grill mere minutes to turn last night's marinated chicken into that carbon."

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

You'll be the centre of attention for a job well done!

'You're not really that much help, Ben.'

'Look at those arms! I was born to ride a Harley Davidson!'

Early Bird Gets the Worm/Night Owl Does the Worm

'He's a yodelling busker!'(Busker on faraway mountain).

'It was great seeing you again Terry, we must do wildebeest sometime.'

"Oh, sorry, I wasn't flirting with you – I was checking my phone."

"What about the five that fell through?"

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

Man biking with an enormous amount of things on his back.

'CANNONBALL!!' - Whale tours.

'I'm collecting goat poop for my strawberries.' 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."