Backbone Buff T-Shirts

Fernmont Chiropractic's new spinal-column bridge made going to the chiropractor much more fun.

Muscles

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

"I told him he should have trained more."

Get on with it!

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'Very funny!'

'It's caused by doing too many wrist curls, overindulging in spinach and... Excuse me. Everyone in here - stat - if you want to see an actual case of 'Popeye Syndrome'!'

Madoff and devil.

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

'The buildings are merging.'

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"I'm thinking of giving up yoga! Yesterday my lotus position turned into a cauliflower!"

Mr Jefferson Brick Proposes a Toast at the 'Rowdy Journal' Offices

(Stocks) (Bonds) (Off Wall St.)

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

'This training session is all about challenging assumptions. For example you see someone looking depressed, dishevelled, unkempt it's easy to jump to conclusions. But they may not be a social worker, they may be a client!'

"We supply the exercise and nutrition program, but it's up to you to supply the narcissism."

'I handle commodities and Dietrich here specialises in stocks and bonds.'

'All I can say is my wife worked out every day when she was pregnant.'

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

In the eighties, Americans knew how to be Americans. Big cars. Big radios. Big hair. Everything was big. Unfortunately, I was so buff that all my huge stuff looked tiny in comparison. So I would loan my stuff to the skinniest, wimpiest kid I could find. Hold this. Let me reminisce vicariously through you. (Sigh.) Those were the days. Is it working?

'Since I got this exercise ball, my abs have gotten into the best shape they've ever been!'

'What do you mean I have to buy both of them?! What kind of a business are you running?'

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

"Did you have any problems at the design stage?"

'Any improvement?' - 'Yes, my arms are getting longer.'

Restored antique carriage in A.D. 2500

Today's seminar is going to be so much fun...