Baby Shower Enthusiast Pillows

Baby in womb chooses from multiple choice pregnancy symptoms...

'Can you gift wrap it? It's for a friend's baby shower.'

'Surprise surprise: Mrs Rabbit is inviting us to yet another baby shower...'

"This app helps you create expletives during labor for reproach, vilification and revilement."

"It's their 'Baby Babble Unlimited' plan!"

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of debt, anxiety and crippling crippling worry."

Tartine

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

Cry babies.

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

'The child is very illogical'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

"They're so adorable at that age!"

Gifts for a cloned baby!

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

The born comedian - 'I'm only two days old and already I'm using great one liners!'

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

Twenty-first century baby walker

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"