Baby Names Prints

"We still can't decide if she's more a Hillary or an Allison"

How to be sure you really like that baby name.

Big book of daft names for kids.

1001 Baby UserIDs

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

'Hi, my name is Bruce Wayne, but not THE Bruce Wayne!'

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

Baby name suggestions.

'I'll never understand parents. They name you Patrick O'Kelly O'Grady and then punish you for shenanigans.'

'Dubble Dawawg A.K.A. Diplo Matt A.K.A. Spyral A.K.A. Sheldon delman - noted rap artist'

"Sinead?!"

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.

'For the sake of convenience everybody just calls me Joe.'

"We named him XB32116 so we never forget the Wi-Fi password."

'Mike, all I'm saying is, 'Fred' is fine, but 'David' has a nicer ring to it!'

'I'd like to have my name legally changed to 'Dot Com.''

"My parents named me Bill because I was past due when I was born."

"'Dear Mrs. Zeus?!' The name's Hera!"

'Jim wants to name her Chateau de la Comte du Seine Auberge, the wine we drank on our honeymoon. I'd settle for Jane.'

Ask me about Naming Rights.

"Actually, the first name was easy. It's her last name we're battling about."

'I'm not Sandy. I thought you were Sandy.'

When More Government Is A Good Thing

"Not so fast. I want to be called 'Nana'."

'"Silent killer'?! That's your nickname? That's so cool Dad!"

"See why I hate my nickname 'Toad Stool'?"

'Come on, I've been waiting twenty minutes.' - 'Shut up. I'm choosing a name for my baby.'

"Poor kid, being lumbered with a name like Kevin. What's wrong with something ordinary like Zain or Kayan?"

'We named him after Andy Rooney because of his irritating whine.'