Baby Monitor Enthusiast Gifts

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

Gifts for a cloned baby!

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Whoa

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Shhh... It's babies app time.'

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

Maternity Ward

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

'How many fingers do you see?'

'He was getting too heavy to carry around in my pouch.'

Uterus: One size fits all.

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Bouncing baby

Maternity Hospital

Giving Birth

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'

"It's from HQ, they're replacing me with a younger man!"

No bottle feeding.

Mobile.

'Well, he certainly has his Father's vocabulary.'

'Forget the wheel. Invent diapers.'