Baby Kick Enthusiasts Pillows

'Did you feel the baby kick that time, hon?'

A midwife holding a baby

'The child is very illogical'

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

"They look so young and helpless."

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

"Here's our little bundle of joy."

"He looks just like your husband."

Maternity Ward

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

'How many fingers do you see?'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

Bouncing baby

'It's a chicken.'

Maternity Hospital

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'