Awkward Conversation Survivors Mugs

Small talk: 'Wow that's really interesting. I've never actually been to Los Angeles, but I do have some friends there. Do you know Lisa Schwartz?'

Very Difficult Conversations

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

"That's the last time I write my own resume!"

"Will this job involve multiple choice, true and false, or essay questions?"

"Ya know, boys and girls studying alone like this is strictly forbidden in Iran."

"Where do you see yourself after 5 beers?"

"Can you characterize yourself in five words."

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"A High-Pain Job? Yes, I believe we have that."

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

'Where do you see yourself five years from now?'

"Tell me about yourself... what you do, where you live, the last four digits of your social security number..."

I have an opening for someone like you. It's called a door.

"So where do you see yourself in 5 years apart from a thousand miles from this f****** s**thole?"

Livin' the dream

'Hi, I'm Raoul...I shall be your talking point of the evening.'

'Have you noticed it, too?'

Before birds and bees,

'Bill, I'm sorry to hear about your going into the hospital. Is it a MALE problem?'

It was the harshest job interviews Peter had ever attended...

"The aliens that control my brain really want me to get this job."

"Isn't there a TED Talk he can listen to about the birds and the bees?"

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but actually 47% of 235 people covering 34%..."

"My last job was as a mine interpreter...I would go to a park and describe what the mime was trying to convey."

"Can you handle a variety of jobs?"

'Is there any particular reason your middle name is stinky?'

'While we didn't see Bill Brewster here in his lifetime, it's good to see him here in death. Uh, let me rephrase that.'

"Hell and back. Very impressive."

"Oh, the pain I can take—it's the awkward silence between conversations that's torture."

"Your credentials are certainly impressive."

'The interview panel will see you now.'

Education Payroll: 'We're trying to resolve your salary problem or, at the very east, put you on hold for th rest of the day.'

'Mom, did I come preassembled or did you and dad have to put me together?'

In the embarrassment cemetery