Attention Divergent T-Shirts

A group of people in an art gallery staring at a phone

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

Look At Me I'm Still Wearing Shorts.

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

EXTROVERTS ANONYMOUS

"No, it hasn't anything to do with my presentation. But wait until you see how I hold everyone's attention with it sitting next to me at the podium."

Try to hold your audience's attention when giving a presentation.

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

"Let's get the important stuff out of the way while I'm still paying attention."

"Are you one of these youngsters who has a very short attention span?"

Media Whore Raceway.

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

'Teacher says I don't pay attention, I have no retention but I'm great at detention.'

'Your attention span is not very long.'

One person's word balloon goes in one ear and out the other of the other person's ears.

"I need a hug."

Caution: Extremely Deep Subject Matter.

"In conclusion, J.D. Salinger's 'The Catcher in the Rye' is a commentary on the injustices and problems of society, especially pertaining to the isolation of individuals."

"It keeps people from falling asleep during meetings."

Follow Me!

'Thank you for calling the attention deficit disorder hotline. . . please continue to hold. . .'

'It's about your son's low attention span,,,'

"The hardest thing about being a youth pastor is keeping my sermons to 140 characters or less."

"I pretend to pay attention by putting my face in screensaver mode."

"I'd give up all that social media in exchange for continuous applause."

'Create excitement in your life! Paparazzi for hire!'

Running coast to coast for attention.

Modern Attention Spans

"What does that one look like to you?"

You Skimmed My Tweet

Welcome to very short attention span.com. Goodbye.

"Shh, listen! The sound of my voice."

'I think you'll find that I'm a very good listener.'

'Demanding attention again, do we?'