Attending Markets T-Shirts

Important balloons, $30.

Sloaney Pony.

Wall Street Couch

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

Why markets crash.

"He's quick with the birds and bees stuff, but then comes the bulls and the bears..."

Dow Jones drop

'In memory of our beloved Skippy.'

Hedge Fund: Our 'Swaps' which mimic stocks, were voted #1 derivative of the year!

Jumping Wall Street.

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

Customer Convention

'In a Washington economic summit, a panel of three economists offered two dozen opinions about the direction of global economics.'

'Mr Rombly has cancelled his appointment. The Dow is up and he's feeling no pain.'

"AXP 0.78, AIG 1.12, T 2.63. . ."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"Market euphoria is at an all time high."

"Looks like the high tech shares have taken another fall."

'He hasn't missed a turnout in ten years!'

'Of course, in the long term we're all extinct.'

'Today, stocks rose on the news that the more people have, the more they want.'

"Let's try to think of something that untold millions of people will buy."

I am your BIGGEST fan!

'Tropical fruit, imported cheese, coconuts...I'm not really into that 'eat locally' stuff.'

Madame Borigard: Reader of the Occult - Derivatives & Credit Default Swaps Explained

'The bailouts worked, the stock market shot up to 15,000 and everyone was relieved.'

"I recommend you invest in oil. Prices are down now, but auto leaks are up."

"Today stocks rose on the news that 'down' is a temporary state of mind."

Wall Street Investing.

An August Bank-Holiday in the East End.

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'I'm home, Honey! Come see what I picked up at the Farmers Market!'

"Let me make this perfectly opaque..."