Astro-curious T-Shirts

"Never mind your astrological sign, what's your net worth?"

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

Marry me astronaut

"...Ooh, I wanna know more about your dark side!"

Spaceman looking out of the window of his spaceship at planets.

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

"Oh Wow! Shooting star!"

NASA, 'I thought I smelled oxygen!'

"I'm dating a lunar astronaut!"

"Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, when Jupiter is in his 6th house or Saturn is in his 2nd, until death do you part?"

'No kidding! I'm a Leo too!'

"We're fascinated by the crop circles in your field..We wondered if you could tell us how they got there ?"

Water divining Mars

"That's want I call a meteor shower!"

"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"

'Harnessing the Black Hole.'

God creating the galaxy.

"What's so galling is that you don't even realize how Earthist you are."

It says, you're going to meet a nice Pisces for a romantic dinner.

Astronaut

'Hmphh, your horoscope says you're going to have a date, with a Taurus, and I'm a Gemini.'

Only in the newspapers.

Solar Range.

"Another fly-over planet."

Pentagon Science Contest: 'Since the military isn't known for doing things for the sake of science, why would they want to figure out how they can people to another solar system.'

"They discovered an Earthlike planet, and it's close." "Earthlike?" "Does it have oceans and beaches and sensual ladies who like to gaze at sunsets?" "It may have liquid water. And it's orbiting a red dwarf, so it'll always look like sunset." "But is there anyone there to whisper sweet nothings to?" "I know a guy at NASA. If they send a probe, maybe he could add your dating profile."

A giant diamond hurtles through space toward a population of very conflicted women.

"I'd be a lot more comfortable with a Pisces."

Map of Solar System from Memory.

Person welcomes alien to Earth, and is consequently zapped.