Apartment Minimalist T-Shirts

“What I lack in stuff I make up for in generational wealth.”

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

'Hey...remember T.V.?

Typewriters and Laptops.

"Not to mention the park view."

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

Your Entire Life Delivered To Your Door!

"I don't bake, I don't cook, but I make one kick-ass vinaigrette."

Bob tries to get off on a technicality.

'You always wanted a larger office with a view.'

Paperless office.

Marcello Mastroianni.

'My philosophy is that the bigger you are, the smaller the desk you need.'

Those magnificent men and their reading machines.

'...and the property comes with a fully fitted kitchen'

CHEZ MOI - formerly CHEZ NOUS

High Tech/Low Tech.

"Do you have this in a flat brown sandal?"

'I warned you...I can only cook two dishes: beef stroganoff and cheese cake.'

'I HATE Spring cleaning!'

The architect speaks: '...I went back to my roots...this house is based on a drawing I did when I was six.'

"Says here tiny houses are the hot new trend. Didn't I always tell you we're ahead of our time, Doris?"

"I'm going off the grid with the option of grid-binging whenever I want."

"I don't want to sound simplistic, but I think a smaller couch with fewer throw pillows would help this marriage a lot."

"Say something. I forget what you sound like."

'I never understood kitchen tables. Why do you think I gave you a lap?'

"I think my filing cabinet is a little more practical."

'No, it's not a new iPhone, it's a Swiss army knife.'

STRIP Hambone: Neddle-less christmas tree screen saver

"Well, it might interest you to know that 'running naked' means running without a watch or iphone."

It's a coffee-table Kindle.

"I guess it's okay for you to go home at the end of the day if you think that's fair to the stockholders."

'I love what you've done with the place.'