Anxiety Ruminator Pillows

'Who wants to be examined first?'

'In the few remaining minutes of the lesson I can't do better than to show you how to fill an accident form.'

'I'm sorry, but I haven't understood a word you've babbled since I turned left on red.'

"Stop telling me how well you did on the written."

'The effects of winter weather on the lambing season has disastrous side effects.'

"I really like smart women."

'The secret to happiness is awaiting F.D.A. approval.'

'Have you got something that says, 'I've got a headache?''

"Anything to accompany a stale marriage?"

"And this will protect him from distemper."

"My psychiatrist advised me to pay taxes quarterly. That way my seething resentment is spread evenly over a year."

"Of course I'm a nervous wreck. I'm man's best friend! Who can take that kind of pressure?"

In Case of Accidents

A pet cage wrapped in chains make the other customers in the waiting room nervous,

"It's just another birthday. . ."

'Yes, most humans call us pests or vermin, but a few of them love us as pets...'

'The most precious thing a practitioner can accomplish, my boy, is to accumulate a devoted following of these damned hypochondriacs."

"You'd be nervous too, if you were on your ninth life."

"Just like he did when he was alive the lazy sod!"

"Have you considered spinal fusion?"

"I see you're on a date at the moment but perhaps later we could meet for a latte."

'Gail, my dear, please don't talk about sex - my God this is a restaurant!'

'Your 401k doesn't look a day over 20.'

"He doesn't seem to be accepting retirement too well."

Dentistry jokes.

"Tell me if this hurts."

'I believe that laughter is the best medicine. Now, if you'll bend over, Mr. Happy will perform your prostate exam.'

'What makes you think your bartender is more qualified than my hairdresser to solve our marital problems?'

"The salesman was right, a carpet with a darker colour will hide all manner of sins."

A family hides from the TV news.

"To meet the government requirements, I'm passing the extra costs to the consumer and our employees."

"Relax. I just nicked myself shaving this morning"

"How are people at my reunion going to recognize me? I look in the mirror and even I don't recognize me."

"Why have you never married?"