Antique Books Pillows

"This book you've brought back is very rare, and has been missing for over 200 years!... Unfortunately, there's a £750,000 fine to pay."

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Southwark Fair.

Second hand furniture.

Rare Books

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Gen-Next Library

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Sundial Time

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

Fossil record player.

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

'This seems like a good time to get rid of some of the king's junk.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

What would Charlotte Bronte do, she thought to herself.

You had me at vintage.

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

Antiques

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

The First Printed Bible

Changes at home

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

'This book is so rare it's never been published.'

Clock and Watch Shop: Second-Hand Clocks and Minute-Hand Clocks.

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

'Who are you kidding? This is a wind-up isn't it!'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - 'Tickets Please!'

A mummy, in police tape, chases a police officer.