Animated Dinner Date Pillows

"I'd skip dessert. You'll be quicker on your feet."

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

"The food isn't bad, but I don't care much for the floor show!"

'There's something hauntingly familiar about the bouquet.'

The Bare Minimum

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

'Tasty bird.'

'I hope you agree, sir. They don't come any fresher than this!'

"I forgot my wallet. Do you know 'Folsom Prison Blues'?"

'The chef says, 'Thank your the compliment on the breast of the chicken and he would like to compliment you on the breast of YOUR chicken'.'

'Not...one...drop.'

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

"Are there any reports of illness at this table?"

'The only thing better than being comped an '83 Amarone, is having a girlfriend who isn't a wine drinker.'

"There's a kind of rhythm to making money that something inside me responds to."

"I refuse to squabble in public until we're legally married."

"I am off duty, but the body cam allows me to discreetly take photos of my meal."

'All right, I agree with you.'

"I've taken the liberty of adding eight thousand dollars to your check so that, while you're stunned with disbelief, I can bang your wife."

"Would you care for something to talk about during dinner?"

'I love you just enough to screw you up for the rest of your life.'

"I'll wait, my wife's in the loo."

Trick questions...

"Those aren't three-star-restaurant pants."

Lady with an inflatable dinner date.

"Could you handle this...I'm all decisioned-out for today."

"Oh, dear me. No, no – I meant the Chehalem 2006, not the $2,006."

'When you invited me out fot dinner, I thought you meant...' 'Shhh!'

'Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me the wonderful meal I just had.'

Computer Dating.

Late for his dinner date for the third time, Randy finds-out the real danger of 'Asalt' weapons. . .

'Did you say something, or did I?'

'I'd like a table by the widow.'

"It's a collection for Shirley. I want to take her to lunch."

"It may be just a simple tomato bisque, but just wait for the roaring and turbulent excitement in your bowels an hour from now."