Animated Critic Mugs

'We're gonna need more lipstick.'

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

Cariactures

"I'm afraid you were drawn too big and not centered on the page."

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"Yes, one is a dog."

Honest Vending

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

Polar bears

'Can't you forget you were an art teacher?'

"I could do that."

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

"Apparently my writing is so bad I've been rejected by a gene editor. She said she could see the lack of talent in my DNA."

Middle East Arms Deal

"Thank God your mother didn't live to see what you've become."

"Well - and I'm not just saying this because you're my husband - it stinks."

"His painting is actually better than it looks..."

Colonel George Hanger atop his Steed

Pastor of Muppets

'Safety Net.'

'I AM a three-toed sloth, but cartoonists always draw us with two toes.'

P.O.W. !! to US credibility.

'It's the new directive from Brussels. We're to steal from everybody and give directly to the banks.'

Tree sturgeon: fish on tree limb.

Non-working dog, please help

Mirror tells wicked queen from Snow White: 'If you do not wish to know the truth, please look away now.'

"The new tax software is a real eye opener. Every misguided, impulsive purchase I made for the business last year really pops and sizzles in a visual data format!"