Animal Irony Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Oh, God – is that what I look like?"

"Say, when did you get so fluff?"

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

'There's nothing wrong with your heart. It's your soft chocolate center.'

'The Buck Stops Here.'

Next year, we are NOT going to Costco.

"Two of every known creature on the planet and you forgot the pooper-scooper?"

Penguin

'Now that you've moved in and unpacked, Higgins, we'd like you to start thinking outside of the box.'

The continuing adventures of Rex, Washington DC insider.

Blind man feeding an empty fish tank

Rogue elephant

"Try to blame that one on the dog."

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'

Vulture proclaims its love for highways.

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.

"Did you really think you were getting in here?"

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

"When I go, I’d like my ashes dumped on top of a squirrel’s head."

'Looks like the Wentworths are still on the outs.'

Various Birds of Pray.

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

"I'm here to join the riot squad: you see, I have a natural ability to disperse crowds. . ."

"She doesn't eat raw zebra... Where can we get Alaska wild salmon in cream truffle sauce in the middle of Africa?"

"In lieu of barking, he recorded a sweet diss track about you."

"Frankenstein? Isn't the story of a being made from the parts of others a little far-fetched?" "I find it very believable."

Swine flu

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

Shop for cats

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

"....one minute I'm there - chewing the cud - the next, I get this urge to lead!"

'I've been sentenced to five weeks while they go on holidays... What about you guys?'

'Of course I look silly. My psychiatrist told me to come out of my shell!

Warbling on the First Date

Select a song: Another Dog Barking. Lots of Other Dogs Barking. Howling. Siren. Doorbell. Dog Karaoke.