Amputation Recovery T-Shirts

I Love Milling Machines

'I'm sorry. We can't break up a set.'

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

Barbeque Casualty.

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

No caption. (Man wearing a cast is in traction. He imagines sheep lining up to jump fence. Sheep also wear casts.)

They've been inseparable since the avalanche.

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

Saline Drip Sommelier.

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

"She keeps getting a stitch in her side."

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

En garde!

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

"I never imagined I'd be up on my feet this soon."

"These are X-Rays of your operation, and this is a selfie I took with your gall bladder."

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

'It will be a difficult adjustment, but it doesn't mean you can't still live a full and rewarding life, say, in the library, or even a miniature golf course.'

"I just can't get over how well you look!"

"I'm sure he'll pull through. He's always been a real fighter."

Your heart is doing well with the pig valve we put in. Now, what was your question?

"I expect a speedy recovery,"

While you're at it, will you sew on my shirt button please?