Amenity Explorer Pillows

The vacation rental agency is saying technically that's a "lap pool," so we can't get our money back.

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Late BroomStick

"We needn't have a fancy home, just a place to rest when we no longer roam."

Remember how you advised me to get a dangerous hobby to build up my self-esteem and impress people? Well, all the dangerous hobbies were already taken. You wrestle alligators

"I shop, therefore I am."

Fist Bumper Cars

"So...do you have a job now?"

A Clown pretends to put his head in the mouth of a TV lion.

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"I've heard this airline's got some unusual inflight entertainment."

Guru.

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'They're only interested in computer generated mammoths.' (Theatrical Agent).

Tunnel of Whale Guts

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'It's not dead, honey. You've just never seen it turned off before.'

Teen's Comet

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

Eager to get back out but want to limit your exposure? Come to Barry's barbershop, restaurant, gym 'n cinema.

'We've got a 50 inch hd lcd 3d t.v with 200 channels and there's nothing on.'

"This is a little embarrassing to admit, but everything that happens happens for no real reason."

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

"Honey, is the car filled up? My project here is finished and after my lunch I'm taking a new job in South America."

Man asking what is a stall at the opera

'I blog, therefore I am.'

Bumper Cars of Love.

'We were made for each other...we hate the same TV shows.'

Watching TV around the world

Food sign on the mountain.

'How would you like your steak, sir?' - 'Big.'

The scourge of the 'burbs, cable pirates board another innocent hom in their unceasing search for that one extra channel, the occasional first-run movie, or the highly-prized pay-per-view sports events..

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

"Can I borrow this?"