Ambition Debater Pillows

'You call that ambition?'

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

We Tenatively Oppose War on Strictly Procedural Grounds

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

Oligarchy

Annual run-off at the mouth.

Dialogue

Ahem. I'm eating. Not now, please. Just one tiny question. Believers I American exceptionalism have always said we're the paragon of democracy. So I'm just wondering … How come one party is passing unnecessary laws that'll keep millions of us from voting? They're robbing us of our voice! Could've surprised me.

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

I'm not making enough money to like you.

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"Now that's a win."

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

Denmark scrapped anti-blasphemy law!

"That's five votes for In The Midst of Winter....three votes for The Hollow Ground....and, again, one vote for Moby-Dick."

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

My brilliant career

Liberal Vote-Shaming Explained

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

Please enjoy this culturally, ethnically, religiously and politically correct cartoon responsibly.

"Hey...look...I'm prepared to admit that I might have been wrong, but...I think it's time to draw a line under it... and y'know...move on..."

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

"As I see it, 'Crazy politics' - like not voting on a supreme court nominee - is better than a complete government shutdown."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"