Ambition Analyst Gifts

"Do you have any hopeless little drongos?"

'Someday, if you're not careful, this could all be yours.'

"If you work hard, exploit your employees, take advantage of a pandemic, use loopholes to avoid taxes,hoard your wealth, and in an act of extreme self-indulgent meaningless vanity, you can someday be an astronaut."

"Enough already with the 'anyone could grow up to be president' creepy stuff!"

'And finally. . . where do you see yourself on the food chain 5 years from now?'

'I missed out on the partnership round again...'

'If at first you don't succeed, you're like most other people.'

'When all else fails I could always become a careers teacher!'

'I wish my dad was an overachiever.'

"Now that I've eaten everybody else, I'm a big fish in a small pond, but it's not as much fun as I thought it would be: Now I'm lonely and hungry..."

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

'I try not to think big too often or I get terrible headaches.'

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

The Salesman

My brilliant career

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

'That's the first cubicle I ever worked in.'

Not thinking BIG enough: Nickel & Dime Bank.

"Today we are going to find out if you can that leap."

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"Look , Malcolm, I get it that you're ambitious. But can't you put that damn thing down just for a minute?"

"My daughter tells me you want to become a doctor."

'What can you wish for?!... Oh, I don't know... Infinite wealth, beautiful women throwing themselves at your feet, fame and admiration, perhaps?... But, don't let me influence you.'

"So...do you have a job now?"

"I've finally arrived. The C.E.O. stopped saying 'who the hell are you' whenever he sees me."

'I have everything a man could want - But I've still managed to hang onto my petty ambitions.'

If a moo can rise to the top, so can I.

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

Gracie for Queen...of the universe.

You Are Now Entering Texas Think Big

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

"You used to be that ambitious."