Alternative Lifestyle Seeker T-Shirts

'Isn't it romantic, being married in the same alley where we first met eight months ago?'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Vegetarian Birds

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Punk Reindeer

'It's going to be a vegan.'

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

The Mainstream

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

REPENT! Get back to nature

"Wait a minute, is that toad I taste? I told you I've gone vegan, Cynthia!"

"You're telling me I should leave the artists' commune that saved me from my stepmother's tyrannical elitism, where I have seven boyfriends, to become the impotent figurehead of another unjust power structure?"

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

'Extinct? Good heavens no. I'm vegan for God's sake.'

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

"Oh, you silly girl, you! Don't tell me you brought home another husband."

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

"I beg to differ."

You and your alternative pregnancy.

"Do you see what you are doing to your mother?"

"You might call it shoplifting officer, but I prefer to think of it as foraging."

'Vegetable proteins sure have caught on. I have to go over to Canyon Gulch and round up a herd of soybeans.'

"We’re trying to inject a little pastoralism into our lives."

"C’mon, Sara. Like you wouldn’t consider – even for a second – accepting an iPhone from the devil."

"Oh, it's always something now he wants to become a vegetarian."

"What do you consider your most attractive feature and what are you doing about it?"

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

Books or Junk Food.

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

The Shy Nudist Camp.