Alsatians T-Shirts

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'In a surprise move, Greece decided to peg its currency against the Baklava.'

'Enter, His Royal Globalness...'

"Squawk! Interest rates are going negative!"

Euro against the Dollar.

The Euro.

Exchange Rate.

'Our portfolio is not going anywhere. I'm going to add some transportation stocks to the mix to see if that will move our investments along.'

"The last thing I remember was asking my broker if all my money had been in risk-free bonds."

"Let us recall the parable of Jesus turning the other tentacle."

"I see your point, but wouldn't it be more fun to spend it while I'm young enough to enjoy it?"

'US stocks dropped on news of more people buying cheap goods from China...'

'Are you sure this isn't the point in which we should stop following the invisible hand of the marketplace?'

'I started at the bottom, running mazes in the lab.'

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

"We're a monopolyopoly. Our company that owns 13 subsidiaries which put on a darn good imitation of competition."

We cater to the small investor.

"And now, if you don't want to know today's Dow Jones closing, look away from your set until the music stops."

"You are now $15,000 richer. I found the online password to your brokerage account 20 traders ago."

'I don't mind having a husband who's a CFA, except when he starts figuring the internal rate of return of a mop.'

'See? THAT'S globalization!'

'You're a bond trader? Don't worry, there's a new drug to treat interest rate sensitivity.'

"And on the eighth day, God lamented the Hollywood adage 'You're only as good as your last picture.'"

Stock tips box outside investment company office.

"Of course - I believe in the Great Spin Doctor in the sky!"

'I must say, that was quite a tweak you came up with.'

"I think he's going to be sick!"

'Charles! Help! Credit Default Swaps!'

'I realize this might be carping but I never did live long enough to enjoy my IRA account.'

US Imports and Exports

'I didn't know the market had dropped that low!'

'My husband has put his money into gold.'

'When Roger died, a little light went out.'

'It's hard to believe that they started out with just SEVEN deadly sins.'